Right then, it’s been an eventful day and I’d like to think I made 2 people very happy.
I got nicked for speeding. Not just any old speeding ticket but the full on, you’re so far over the limit we’re taking your licence and we’ll post it back in 3 months and until then you’re not riding any further in Latvia
Basically they got me bang to rights, I missed a 70kph sign and just carried on at about 100kph until I saw the cops, thought what the fuck do they want and looked at my satnav to see 43mph limit!
They immediately took my licence and passport, told me I was fucked and got me to use google translate to check their book of speeding penalties and I was due a €420 fine and an immediate 3 month ban, no negotiations allowed. I put on my best I’m very sorry, I missed the sign, can’t I just have a fine approach and they said no, I could go to a cash point, get the money and I wouldn’t be banged up until tomorrow but I was still banned.
At this point I started to get worried but set off for a cash point thinking should I just fuck off and when I got to the Hook (assuming I escaped Latvia) claim I’d lost my passport. It’s a dead cert they’d have chased me for a bigger fine when I got home so I got the cash and returned, still trying to look remorseful and grovelling a lot.
The two cops then claimed that they didn’t want to ban me but technically they had to make me ride to the cop shop, leave the bike until I could get it home by courier.
I made yet another appeal for clemency and they finally did what all good cops should do and said they’d ‘fine’ me with no receipt but I had to leave the country immediately. Too right I’ll go, it was about 10 miles to the Lithuanian border and we settled on €200 in nice new notes. I’d have paid €500 if they’d asked but they obviously thought they were cleaning me out because I claimed the ATM had a €200 limit.
Am I bothered? Not really, it cost me about half what I paid for a new radiator on the 1190 last year and I lost about 45 minutes. I’d been taking the piss out of speed limits since I left home and I carried on afterwards so I hope they spend the money wisely and snort coke off hookers tits with it the pair of twats .
Apart from that it’s been an alright day, I’m in a bum hole place called Druskininkai where a double Stoli costs €1.30 and last time I had a session on that I ended up snorting it up my nose.
That sounds like a result; considering; jammy fucker; long may it continue. . What the fuck was that dark larger you was drinking; .